What Do You Do When You're Stuck

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I failed to write a book for 4 years.

I tried every trick I knew — set goals, block off time, tell other people, and so on. Nothing worked. I began to wonder,

Am I going to be the guy who always talks about writing a book, but who never does the damn thing?

It sure felt like it, and that was frightening.

It's unbearable to be around people who never get around to the things they say they want to do. After enough excuses, you want to grab them by the collar and say: Just do it, or stop talking about it. NO MORE EXCUSES!

I was well on the path to becoming that guy.

It was an odd place to be, especially because I've excelled in the "science of achievement" for most of life. Achieving things has always seemed simple. Set goals, create a plan, and execute. With enough time and effort, you eventually get to where you want to go.

But with the book, I felt helpless. After 4 years of tinkering, I had a title and some research.

I had a come to Jesus moment while at a conference in Mexico. Everyone I met asked me what I did for work. The honest answer: I'm not sure. I'm supposed to be writing a book, but I don't do much writing.

I decided to bluff: I'm writing a book. It will be done in the next year.

I enjoyed the conference so much that I decided I'd come back the next year. And I had bluffed to enough people that I figured it would be too embarrassing to come back in a year without a book in hand.

Now I had to figure out how to beat the multi-year resistance.

I knew from past experiences that progress is really motivating. If I'm ever stuck on problems or overwhelmed, I just start doing things. And with enough progress, my problems and overwhelm go away.

With the book, all I needed was to get one or two good chapters done, and the momentum would carry me forward. I knew that I could get those chapters done in a short period of time if I wrote a little bit every day.

That's when I decided to draw on my baser motivations.

I grew up without money, so I enjoy making it and really hate losing it. That means I'm hyper-motivated when I have money on the line.

I'm the kind of guy who is an average billiards player if we're playing for fun, but as soon as we're betting for cold hard cash, I'm sinking every shot.

I leveraged this "money on the line" tactic in 2016 when I was trying to become a better person. After reading Dale Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People, I decided that I would stop complaining.

To hold myself accountable, I paid my roommate $1 every time I complained. Within a few days, I was radiating with positivity.

Perhaps I could try a similar approach with the book.

I told a new friend from the conference that I wanted to write for one hour every day in November. I would pay him $50 for every day I didn't write. He took the deal — it was all upside from a looney new friend.

The plan worked. Every day I didn't want to write, the $50 penalty got me in front of a computer and typing away.

By the end of the month I wrote 25,000 words.

I was also excited about the book for the first time. It was no longer a dream sitting in my head. It was a REAL work in progress. If I kept up the pace, I could finish a draft in two more months.

But resistance beat me again.

In December and January, I had no daily writing goal or a $50 penalty. I barely wrote a word. I was back to tinkering around and not doing much.

I decided to hire a book coach. He suggested I work with an editor. For $1,500, a memoir specialist could read my draft and give me feedback.

I wasn’t making money, so I was a little hesitant. But I realized that this was the exactly the kick in the butt I needed. I paid the $1,500 and set a date to send a draft.

Over the next 45 days, I wrote like a maniac. And last week, I sent a 72,000 word draft of the book to the editor.

Even if the editor adds no value during the review, the cost is already covered by the accelerated progress and confidence I've gained.

I'm still a long way from the finish line, but I'm now a hell of a lot closer than I was a few months ago.

And for better or worse, it's all thanks to remembering how money motivates me. Putting money on the line was the hack I needed to get me writing consistently.

I still don’t know why the book has been more difficult than other projects. Perhaps it’s because writing a book is hard. Maybe I'm afraid of failing. It's probably both. But the "why" doesn't really matter. I've now found a way to get to where I want to go, and that's all I need.

I'm no longer the guy talking about writing a book; I'm doing it.

As for what this embarrassing tale has to do with you, I'm sharing it with you because everyone has their version of this struggle.

Whether it's a book, a business, or something you've always wanted to do, it's easy to let years pass without making any progress on your dreams.

If enough time passes, you might decide to give up on something that could have been a very rewarding part of your life.

And that would be a damn shame.

— Cal

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